Stopping by Woods in My Tesla Model S

by Steve Amidon

Who owns these woods?—I could give a shizz.

I need a place to take a whizz;

He will not see me stopping here

To sign my name with yellow piss.

 

My sexy car doesn’t find it queer

To pause without a rest stop near

A car is not a man, you see,

Though I call him Kit, he never answers me.

 

I give my Schweddy Balls a shake

And zip my pants to punctuate

The quiet eve and nature’s keep

With sounds no lips can replicate.

 

My bladder’s empty, I’m living large

And happy in my musky barge

With miles to go before I charge,

With miles to go before I charge.